Faith

Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ. (Romans 10:17)

Growing up, faith didn't come easy for me. There was a lot going on in my life that made me question if God existed. I'm not saying that I had the hardest life there was, but it wasn't idealic. There's some things I don't feel comfortable sharing out here in cyberspace yet, but some things I can talk about. I remember moving to NJ in fourth grade, a wealthier town with a good school disctrict. My family was comfortable, but my parents worked hugely long hours to make ends meet and we were expected to start working with odd jobs as kids and then with our working papers to help out with expenses we needed to cover. We were very different from the most every other kid in town. My sister was in college when we moved there, and my three older brothers all adjusted well. I didn't. I remember moving during 4th grade, right at the end, which is a rough time for girls and cliqeness. The other girls, most of them, made my life a living hell. I got picked on and teased on a daily basis and would frequently go home in tears. It was the most miserable experience and this went on straight through about 9th grade, when the kids just more left me alone. That was such a relief! At that point, I more came in to my own and fell in to a group of close friends, who I am still close friends with to this day (and who I wouldn't give up for the world).

Now how does this relate to faith, especially since I lost most of mine through all this (and some other personal things going on)? It has everything to do with it. There wasn't a day that I wouldn't wake up with some amount of faith that things wouldn't get better, although it did take years. Now when I am around kids (as my job has me doing), I find that I have things in better retrospect. I also see that I am able to have a greater understanding for the fact that God will always give us the strength to get through things, to find to something better, to be able to grow and understand what real love means. He always has faith in us that we can make it through, that we can succeed. We need to have more faith in Him, that he will walk us through, and that we can suceed in whatever we are handed. We are only given us much as we can handle and tests like this show that. Have faith and all will be well!